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Archive for the ‘life coach training’ Category

‘The more we accept our thoughts without thinking about them, the more we define ourselves by what we think, the more likely it is we are living in some internal stress loop of suffering. Belief in our unexamined internal stories is not a belief in facts.’ The Unlimited Self by Jonathan Heston

Heston’s words gives us pause for thought. What Heston shares is something we know innately but find it difficult to do. To me his words resonate from a mindful and a spiritual context. If we are not self-aware, if we get caught up in the emotions, and then make choices, we are leading a reactive life. The stories we tell our selves and excuses we make are due to circumstances or other’s actions.

Let’s take a step back and see why we tend to behave in this reactive way.

  1. We are not our thoughts: If you put some distance from your inner commentary, and just observe, you will notice that most of your thoughts are there to a) justify one’s actions, b) nulify someone else c) victimise one self. We have the capacity to change our thinking style.
  2. Stuck Beliefs: When we are conditioned from childhood by our parents, teachers, elders, to follow a certain path in life, we tend to forget that actually, we can create a new path, we are unique and living in a different time.
  3. Self -esteem: We compare ourselves with others, and often feel we are not good enough. If we lack the attitude of acceptance towards self and others, every aspect of our life is affected by the way we approve of ourselves, and value ourselves in context to the world. Every thought, behaviour and action can be linked back to how we feel about ourselves. If you are wired to follow a certain way of thinking which is to be unkind and critical to yourself, every behaviour and action becomes a struggle. Every goal and dream will remain unfulfilled.

Writing this book on self-esteem has been a journey of self-discovery to understand the relevance of how we value or devalue ourselves in this hyperconnected world. If we can take the inside-out approach to our life, we can find a way to wards a path of fulfilment.

It is time to reboot your thinking style, reflect on your inner needs, and revive your goals that bring meaning and purpose to your life.

It has brought some meaning to mine.

This book is not to tell you what’s wrong or what there is to fix in ourselves. It is not a self-help book, it is more of a self-understanding book, covering real life stories of different people and to give us an glimpse of the different ways to face life.

Why i wrote it? Because it helped me realise that it is okay to be okay with oneself, as I am, flaws and all.

Do take out some time and read this book. It has made a difference to me, I hope it will make a difference to you

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Once upon a time, far far in the past, eons ago, there was a woman who spoke her mind. A resilient wise woman, people were drawn to her for some reason.

She was from the future. And she said that the people in the future experienced many intensely painful moments emotionally.

They were unhappy inside. Externally they looked fabulous, successful and lived ecstatic lives.

But they lived in fear. They were afraid of other people’s judgements.

People were scared to reveal their true selves. Afraid of standing out, being different, or wanting a different kind of fulfilment.

Many didn’t even know who they were…they went along with whatever they were told. They lived, ate, slept, spoke, behaved, as they were told.

Inside themselves, they felt like strangers. Who is this me? They asked themselves. Why am I not happy when life has provided all that i need?

The question is not about need but want.

What do you really want?

Reflect on this question.

So many have lost their identity in the bumpy ride of living with controllers.

If you feel restless, if you are looking for something to dissolve this unidentifiable feeling inside you…then reflect on your present. Ask yourself: WHAT do I really WANT?

As a spiritualist once said: The past is dead, the future unborn, the present is your only living breathing moment.

Why waste precious moments on being someone you are not.

If you want a listening ear, if you want to talk about what is holding you back,and go on a journey of self-discovery…contact me at shobhanovels@gmail.com

I am open to listen without offering advice or judgement. You will be your guide to understanding yourself. I will lead you to sync with your inner self. To tap into the ‘real me’ zone, to reveal and accept whoever you choose to be.

(All communication will be kept in confidence)

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Get real, what I mean is get down-right real and honest with yourself, address all preconceived notions, fears, vulnerabilities, expectations, disappointments, and dreams, face them squarely and honestly.

The idea is to bust that illusion and get truthful about what is possible to achieve within the set boundaries of our evolving lifestyle.

Face them, to fade them…

Experiencing the evolving emotions, is the first step towards facing and accepting one self. So, no matter what you experience – good, bad, ugly – face it truthfully and humbly. Be self-honest.

This kind of brutal self-honesty is a necessary first step to understanding the self. Because, as clinical psychologists explain, self-deception is exemplified in our thinking patterns, beliefs, behaviors, emotional reactions, and relationships.

We are constantly lying to our selves, it is the kind of lying that comes from not being psychologically strong enough to be honest with ourselves. To go within and develop the understanding of who we are and what we stand for, is necessary to live a fulfilling life.

Going within, addressing the personal faults, or limiting beliefs lifts the veil that stops us from seeing the truth, so we continue to deceive ourselves.

Every aspect of understanding one self is a meaningful approach to living.

Some people are more in tune with themselves, while others are fine-tuning that connection.

Be brave to accept that each of us is unique, and it is okay to not fit in.

We need more of the real self to reveal itself.

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